In order to finalize my project, I wanted to do a complete circle back from my research to my father’s story. I intended on making this piece awkward and strenuous to view; a bit in the tradition of expressionism like Soutine’s. The idea was to be faithful to the emotions my father remembers. This was achieved through several distinctive formal qualities. The composition is asymmetrically-balanced and dynamic to convey subjectivism and emotionalism; I also wanted to evoke a pattern evoking Christmastime aesthetics. But the most fundamental is the heaviness obtained by the jerky, erratic, and aggressive movement present in the piece. The coarse and thick texture plays a major part in conveying emotions of disconsolateness, powerlessness, and frustration. The brushstrokes of the piece are powerful and violent. I believe that in order for this piece to convey certain negative emotions, the nature of the brushwork had to be equivalent to these sensations. The near-neutral color scheme of most of this piece creates substantial contrast with the beaming cadmium red used for the Christmas wrapping paper. The wrapped bottles do nothing to dispel the sense of utter dejection. The use of blacks and grays is crucial in this piece. The darkness surrounds the portrayal of my dying grandfather. The bed is skewed, irregular, collapsing, and deeply subjective. The hands are ghostly, fading from memory. At times I let the paint trickle down the canvas, from the very top to the very bottom; that too aggravated the sense of despair and dejection I want the piece to impart.
