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Table that might have appeared to change position in space.

As an ordering principle, our compartment worked tirelessly attempting to calibrate the right lickpot conditions conducive to the psychic illusion of tables. Calibration was a laborious process of suitable adjustments made by delicate quibbling and petty bickering. (Quibbling the lickpot conditions, while dependent upon an ostensibly identical method to petty bickering, seemed entirely different just because different voices were used in our roleplay.) As an unshakeable matter of fact, we held that repeated failure to calibrate was a good thing since it would eventually lead to the Golden Modification, the legendary Final Procedure that would result in favourable lickpot conditions. Only thing was, we had no way of knowing if we were getting closer to, or moving further away from, the Final Procedure.

In hindsight, quibbling and bickering over favourable lickpots was counterproductive: it tied up resources that could have been invested in the kind of quantifiable research we now know is viable (i.e. experiencing effects while remaining unaware of methods). Little did we realise, we had exhausted all the remaining time our compartment had left in this futile endeavour.

Just before we ran out, we got wind that Some Freelancer from Tampa Bay FL., was boasting that she’d glimpsed a ‘hermit table’, a table hidden in plain sight in a secret compartment. This secret compartment was said to be unfamiliar insofar that it did not contain any tables of any description. In this secret compartment – it was speculated – the apparition of a table might be formed more easily since the compartment had no concept of even the appearance of tables. Secret compartmental ignorance surely made it simple to focus on manifesting in plain sight?

Some Freelancer told us that she’d spent all her unpaid vacations in this secret compartment, prentending to tan while furtively conjuring tabular relations. Surely an apparent table would, ultimately, result from the many relations Some Freelancer was conjuring? In such a happy event, would a simple process of transposition into our compartment not finally enable us to witness the psychic illusion of a table?

This timewasting play was a great success; for Some Freelancer. Following the catastrophe that ensued, it seems likely to us that, what we thought had been a secret compartment, may, in fact, have been a hollow compartment inside of which was a duplicate of our compartment.


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